Celebrating The New Family

CELEBRATING THE NEW FAMILY
A Ceremony for Including Children in the Wedding Service
By Roger Coleman

(Presentation of the Family Medallion® and/or lighting of the Family Candle usually follow the pronouncement of the couple as husband and wife.)

INTRODUCTION

A wedding is often viewed as the union of two people. In reality, however, it is much broader. As we give thanks (to God) for the love that brings ____________ and ___________ together, so, too, we recognize the importance of families and the additional love and responsibility that family and friends bring to this relationship.

THE UNITY OF GOD'S FAMILY

We are, in fact, all members of one family, of God's family. This relationship is emphasized in the Scriptures where it is written (Letter to James 1:16, adapted from The Living Bible):

"And it was a happy day for God when we received our new lives through the truth of God's word and we become, as it were, the first children in God's new family."

(Other Biblical passages emphasizing the oneness of God's family include Leviticus 26:4‑6, Ezekiel 34:25‑29a, Ephesians 2:14 and Galatians 3:28‑29.)

RECOGNITION OF CHILDREN

As part of the family nature of marriage (or God’s creation), we recognize _____________________ and the significant role he/she/they play(s) in this union today celebrated. (Child or children may be brought forward by grandparents or others if they are too young to stand as members of the wedding party.)

(Optional Readings: The Gospel of Mark, 9:36-37, when young children are involved. Also, Psalms 127, substituting “children” for “sons.”)

PRESENTATION OF THE FAMILY MEDALLI0N®

___________ and ___________ present to _________________________ this/these Family Medallion(s) as a symbol of family commitment and in recognizition of the hope and joy made visible through this marriage. Marriage is often symbolized by two merged circles. The Family Medallion has three circles to acknowledge love as a relationship of more than two people. When two people love each other, they reach out to include others.

(The following may be repeated by the person performing the ceremony or by one or both parents.)

In the giving of this/these Family Medallions(s) we pledge to you, _________________________, our continuing love even as we surround you now with our arms of support and protection. (Children may receive a hug from parents at this point. Also, parents may express their own statement of love and support.)

(Option: Bride and Groom may also choose to also exchange Family Medallions following their presentation to children.)

LIGHTING THE FAMILY CANDLE

(Couple may light a Family Candle following the Family Medallion presentation or use only the Family Candle to symbolize their family commitment. In the candle ceremony, each family member is invited to come forward. The bride and groom take their candles, lit before the ceremony, and light the candle of each child. Together, they all light the Family Candle.)

Parents (together): ________________, we wish to recognize your continuing importance in our lives by sharing with you the light of our love.

Officiant: As your lights grow brighter when you bring them together, may your love for one another continue to increase. May life bring you much happiness and joy, for steadfast love endures forever.

(Participants return their individual candles to the candle holders and join hands for the following optional reading and family prayer.)

READING (Optional)

Our children are gifts entrusted to us not as objects to be controlled but as human beings, each unique in their own personality, each separate in their own identity. Consider these words from The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran:

"You may give them your love but not your thoughts, For they have their own thoughts. You may house their bodies but not their souls, For they dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goest not backward nor tarries with yesterday. You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth."

PRAYER FOR THE FAMILY

(Couple and children as well as congregation may be invited to join hands. The Lord’s Prayer may be used as an optional prayer.)

Creator God, you have made us in your own image, male and female, that together we may live as members of your one family. As you surround us with never‑ending love, strengthen us that we, too, might reflect your love, becoming ever supportive of one another in times of sorrow, forgiving of one another in times of anger, patient in those moments when we seek to rebuild out of the pain of broken trusts and shattered dreams.

We give thanks, O Lord, for the relationship here celebrated. In your presence we are humbled by the recognition that, today, we face a new future, one which love has unfolded and is unfolding before our very eyes. May we ever respect the sanctity of this gift. As you have filled our cup with joy, may we share the strength our deepening love for one another, including, in ever widening circles, those who wait without hope and live without love's shelter. Amen.

A BLESSING

And now, go forth bound together by the love of God. Go forth with hope and joy and a heart full of dreams, knowing that God is always with you. Amen.

(Couple kiss and then embrace children.)

INTRODUCTION OF THE FAMILY

It is my pleasure to present to you _________________________and_________________________ in their new relationship as husband and wife and their son/daughter/children __________________________________

or (when the bride and groom have children together)

Now I present to you the _________________________ family.

Quote

With children present, marriage is more than the union of two people, It is the proclaiming of a new family.

Presentation of the Family Medallion®, with its three merged circles, acknowledges love as relationship of more than two people. When two people love each other, they reach out and include others.

FAMILY MEDALLION® IS A REGISTERED TRADEMARK OF CLERGY SERVICES, INC. ALL MATERIALS IN THIS CEREMONY ARE COPYRIGHTED. REPRODUCTION WITHOUT WRITTEN PERMISSION IS PROHIBITED.